That’s me now! Ooh look!
*sigh* Fundamentally I am WAY too easily amused.
Also, an excellent question was asked this week by Nixthings about the crackers from last week.
“Lori,” she asks, “Why – if you wanted cookies, and your insanely irrational rules dictate that the only way a cookie can be a cookie if it has chocolate – did you start with crackers, which you were obviously displeased with, and go through all this work to turn them into cookies instead of just starting with cookies in the first bloody place and save us all LEAST three pictures to wade through?”
1. Nixthings is Australian, so I’m sure she’d say something like “first bloody place.”
2. Nixthings is lovely and wouldn’t ever actually ask me a question phrased like that because she seems to have impeccable manners so I may have exaggerated slightly in the way I paraphrased.
But that’s a perfectly reasonable question to ask. And often I forget that just because you can read the words I write here that it doesn’t mean you can actually see into my head and get all the backstory.
And I’m so GOOD with backstory, normally. I can do backstory backwards and forwards. Mostly people have to urge me to just MOVE THE DAMNED STORY ALONG.
Sort of like now for instance.
But the answer is: Child B (the oldest) is convinced that chocolate makes his acne flare up, despite me and his doctor backed by the entire American Medical Association telling him that this is not so. He claims to have done controlled studies. In labs, with white coats and mice. And he’s pretty determined. He thinks there’s a link, he likes his skin free from blemish, and so he does not eat chocolate. We’re not sure he’s a real teenager, we think he may be remotely controlled by some hostile alien species waiting to take over the world one iPod at a time (it would explain so much, wouldn’t it?). But regardless, he’ll go without a treat if the only treat is chocolate, so because I love him THAT MUCH, I sacrificed one third of my perfectly good cookie dough and turned into cracker dough.
For which I retro-actively give myself +3 Martha Points.
Bringing my new total to: +22 points.
Not bad for a day’s work.