I’m typing minus a thumb.
The thumb is still here.
No zombies were involved, but I am pointing the finger (not a thumb) at a can of diced tomatoes that I think has made a deal with some dark force somewhere south of here. (And I don’t mean Salinas.)
So I’m typing without a thumb. Which means using the space bar is taking on a level of difficulty on par with knitting while wearing boxing gloves. Not that I go in for that sort of thing. Not that it’s wrong, immoral or illegal (unless you’re left handed in Rhode Island) it’s just that I think I’m a hazard to people if I have knitting needles in my hands under any circumstances, put boxing gloves on me and it’d be easier to just put my name on a cell in San Quentin and save the taxpayers some money.
But this post is not about my thumb, it is about my alter-ego.
(My alter-ego, by the way, is far more graceful than I and doesn’t HAVE a cut thumb.)
I interviewed my alter-ego as part of Kludgy Mom’s “Back to School, Back to Blogging” program. A workout for your blog à la Jane Fonda. (Without the leg-warmers, but with the tight abs.) The idea is from Sheri at Old Tweener.
Lori’s Interview with Her Alter-Ego
Lori: First, let me thank you for coming by, that was very kind of you.
Lori’s Alter Ego: Think nothing of it. I notice you don’t have any refreshments available.
Lori: Yes, sorry about that. The cats got into the paté. Anyway, I wanted to ask you…
Lori’s Alter Ego: Excuse me for iterrupting, but am I meant to sit anywhere?
Lori: Um, sure…anywhere you like.
Lori’s Alter Ego: Perhaps you could direct me as to which pile I should sit on. The laundry, the unpaid bills or this tangle of computer chargers.
Lori: Whichever one won’t give you a rash in the nethers. Now, what we’re all wondering…
Lori’s Alter Ego: Could I trouble you for a drink?
Lori: Oh, sure. Sorry. Let me see…there’s a half a glass of lemonade left in this pitcher, a half a glass of apple juice in this pitcher and a can of Fresca that was opened yesterday. I could throw those all together, add a little vodka, and call it a cocktail!
Lori’s Alter Ego: *ahem* Umm…thanks. Maybe just water.
Lori: You sure? I could add a mint sprig.
Lori’s Alter Ego: Actually, I’m fine. Really. Now, what was your question?
Lori’s Alter Ego: I believe you invited me here for an interview.
Lori: Oh, yes! Of Course! Silly me. Now, what we’re all wondering is if YOU COULD STOP THAT FOR JUST TEN MINUTES PLEASE!!!
Lori’s Alter Ego: Excuse me?
Lori: The drumming. It’d be better if drum practice waited until we were done.
Lori’s Alter Ego: Which isn’t yet?
Lori: One question. So what we’re wondering is, if you were in charge of the blog, what would you write about? Would you stick with the whole Martha Points thing?
Lori’s Alter Ego: Well I do like earning points…
Lori: There’s the losing points too.
Lori’s Alter Ego: *snort*
Lori: Pardon me?
Lori’s Alter Ego: You have a good sense of humor, really. I wouldn’t be losing points.
Lori’s Alter Ego: No.
Lori: Huh. But that’s the funny part.
Lori’s Alter Ego: Not to me.
Lori’s Alter Ego: Were there going to be any more questions?
Lori: No, I think that about covers it.
Lori’s Alter Ego: So will you be turning the blog over to me?
Lori: No, no…not just yet. But thanks for offering.
Lori’s Alter Ego: I could do hand knit pot-holders.
Lori: Thanks, but I just don’t think that’s what my readers would go for.
Lori’s Alter Ego: ::shrugging:: Ok, suit yourself.