I kill me.
It is possible that the eggnog was flowin’ a little liberally here in Martha Points land in the wee hours of the afternoon.
As I look at my statement here, I see that somehow I am still sitting at only +8 Martha Points.
Don’t I earn interest here?
Shouldn’t this have compounded into at least a +15 or +18 by now?
Now, it is true that I have not wrapped a single gift, and one wouldn’t be far wrong if one suggested that I still have shopping to do, and I couldn’t call you a liar if you pointed out that I have a stack of Christmas cards that have not yet been mailed sitting next to me.
But I’m sure if I look HARD enough, I can scrape together a FEW more points.
The trick is going to be not finding so many penalties that I end up BACK in negative numbers.
It’s the penalties that kick your heiney when you’re bending over to water the damned Christmas tree.
Grrr…Cursing the Christmas tree: -2 Points.
I need to watch myself here.
Ok…To the points!
Current standing: +8…darnit, I mean +6 Martha Points.
- One additional guest post at the lovely Crunchy Betty: +5 points
- Posting the link to the guest post before the guest post actually happened: -2 points
- Striking carpet in Child C’s room after the Great Laundry Round-up of 2010: +4 points
- Accommodating my Jewish husband’s need for a real Christmas tree: +6 Points
- Decorating the tree before it was 7-foot piece of kindling: +4 points
- Eating my weight in Russian Tea Cookies (which are technically crackers, but GOD I love those things): -3 points
- Failing to identify the substance that is making Nimbus throw up: -3 points
- Coercing the kids into cleaning up the aftermath of the throw-uppy Nimbus: Umm…I don’t actually know if that’s a plus or a minus.
- Patio fountain turning into the miniature sound-stage for the Northern California production of “Creature of the Black Lagoon”: -5 Points
Which brings me to a new grand total of +12 Points.
GEEZ LOUISE talk about swimming upstream.
This calls for drastic measures. So, this weekend I will: bake bread, shampoo carpets, wrap cats, comb gifts, sing wine, mull carols, deck kids and feed halls. The snowman will be Frosty, the Gentleman will be rested, nights will be silent and wonderlands will be wintery.
I will need rum, yarn, brandy, spackle, vodka, yeast, tequila, medium density MDF and a martini shaker.
It’ll be legendary.