My Particular Species

There are so many…

The Northern Lace-Crested B-Cuppers

The Great Plains Domesticus Flaticus

The Boom-Boom Chakalakas

The Double-D Dippers

The Maidenform Warbler

The Horned Silicon Plunger

The Red-Cheeked Bishop Teasers

The Transvaal Massive Marvels

The Lesser Western Areoli

And my particular species…

The Southward Migrating Teton Roosters

But I wish I could get my hands a pair of upward pointing wandering tattlers.

Sadly I lack the proper net.


  1. The Double-D Dippers…Hahahaaa! That’s me!

    So funny. Thanks for making me laugh right out of the gate this morning. Not an easy task, I’ll tell ya.

  2. Career option B (if the sidewalk chalk drawings don’t work out or Burt kicks you off his corner): Copy writing for Maidenform, Vicky’s Hush Hush and Bali.

    I have had three stages in my life:

    Joy-full Jugs
    Deflated Smoke and Mirrors
    Miracle of Modern Science Mamma

  3. For mine to migrate, they would have to actually exist.

    So now I am quite jealous of you, and your fine species, no matter how far they migrate.

  4. I used to have the Boom-Boom Chakalakas, but after 3 kids, they’ve definitely migrated southward. Funny post, thanks for the laugh!

  5. So here I am seriously trying to come up with an appropriate nickname for what I’ve got going on in my five-year-old Target bra when I’m supposed to be calling my grandmother.

    But I can’t stop snickering about the lesser western areoli so I give up. You totally win.

    Plus? Grandma’s waiting and I don’t even want to THINK about her boobs…

  6. Pop’s wife & I are of a similar species. However, my Massive Milk Makers? While currently further north than they have been since pre-mother hood? Will most certainly migrate further south. It is my understanding that subsequent migrations beyond the 1st are always further south. *sigh*

  7. I guess I’d be in the Double D Dippers category…considering the huge-ass brassiere I have to wrangle the ladies into every day that’s probably where I belong.
    Hilarious post…..some of the comments crazy funny too! Of course, guess when ur talking about boobs, all bets are off!


  8. I am apparently the bastard child of a Double-D Dipper and a Transvaal Massive Marvel.

    Raised by a family of Boom-Boom Chakalakas.

    When they finish their eventual southward migration, new meaning will be given to FOOThills.

  9. Mine need a little pick-me-up if you know what I’m sayin’ – they’re not as bad as the southward migrating teton roosters, but I would also like some upward pointing wandering tattlers.

  10. NPR says to take the old over the shoulder boulder holders and use them to support your tomato vines.

    True story.

    Your hubs would develop a new found love for tomatoes for lunch.

    You, not so much.

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